I'll be very honest - I'm not a feminist, which in my mind, are really "masculinists" - a.k.a., women trying to be men. I find that denying the way you were created is pointless and anti-Torah. Even presumtuous! I mean, who are you to question G-d's creation and the strengths and responsibilities given to both man and woman?
But getting back to my point, it is interesting how YU's paper is "The Commentator," a word we normally associate with Rashi, Rambam, and other meforshim (translation: commentaries on the Torah). It is the active, vibrant contribution of men to the ever-living Torah.
The women's newspaper, on the other hand, is "The Observer," conjuring up an image of a figure behind the window, peering out at the world. But staying there. No proactivity.
Now, it's funny, because I am writing this without even thinking of my point - truth be told, I don't think I have a point. Really, I'm just doing this for fun. But now that I look back on what I wrote, that second paragraph that might have seemed merely tangential is actually crucial. Everything I said up there (i.e. - my personal views on "feminism") is highly relevant to the random point I'm raising here, because I believe that a frum woman should be proud of her role as mother, wife, and indeed, ultimate teacher in her home. She is the one making many of the decisions that will raise a new generation, keeping the eternal Torah alive. The role G-d gave her (look at commentaries, and that wasn't meant to be funny, to Breishis/t about the creation of Adam and Chava) is meant to be different from that of man, yet no less important. Her role in shaping the lives of her own family, inside her home, is of galactically proportional importance. And to put it plainly, men are meant to be the ones outside, and women are meant to be inside. The roles that evolve from there are obvious. (Not that women shouldn't work - but that's another discussion...)
So it's no surprise that I find it ironic that the names of the YU and Stern newspapers actually reflect the roles that Hashem gave men and women, respectively. The men,actively commenting, while the women are taking a step back, observing.
Now only if "The Observer" would stick to that role... :-)
(I'm just waiting for the comments bashing that last statement.)
7 comments:
"galactically proportional importance"
I liked that line.
Thanks! I like it too - but I admit, it it took a few reading-overs to see if it made any sense...
It sounds very poetic the way you wrote it. The other way of expressing that would have been "importance of galactic proportions" - which sounds a bit like cheesy science fiction.
I noticed this name significance thing a few years ago when I started writing for The Commentator under my friend who was the editor at the time (he thought it was ironically humorous as well).
The whole "masculinists" thing is very reminiscent of what one of my rabbeim in Israel used to say. He remarked that most feminists are in fact, "masculinists" - whereas his wife was a true feminist - along the lines that you mentioned, in that she celebrated her G-d given role as woman without trying to be a man. She isn't one of those oppressed kollel-wife/rebbetzin types who don't know anything beyond the kitchen and making babies either - she is actually a very successful child therapist (psychologist maybe?).
Ah, well, I'm glad I'm not the only one who finds humor in the situation!
The Jewish world needs to place more importance and esteem on the types of women like your rebbe's wife. I was on Torah Tours over Simchas Torah in a more out-of-town community, and had a really interesting conversation there with one of the women about the lack of strong female role models among the Jewish communities. She was admiring a woman who spoke recently to their girls, a woman who was somewhat of a female orthodox rabbi, if that actually can exists within the frameworks of halacha and mesorah. I tried explaining to this woman that the kinds of role models (who are unquestionably true to Torah) do exist. I grew up with one of the best examples in the form of my rebbetzin, and later in high school, many teachers who embodied a real Torah-driven "feminism."
It is unfortunate, but the women who could serve as true examples of what a strong, powerful eshet chayil is, tend to be less vocal about how they fulfill their roles. And that is where we hit a Catch-22 (is that the right term?); they are the best role models, and within that role, don't feel a need to publicize their Jewish feminine pride to the world. They are content to keep on with their lives...
And this is where I just get frustrated because I wish there was someway to impart to young women this sort of empowering message of what their lives could be like. But it is so difficult...
Not to patronize, but Catch-22 is indeed the right term. It's also a funny book (but inappropriate - I had to read it for high school, but probably wouldn't read it nowadays).
There is a couple in my community where the wife (especially according to my mother, who loves her) is a very proper role model. Her husband is a rebbe at the day school, but she's an established OT at a local hospital. They also have 7 kids and are a Ner Yisrael family, so despite convention she's not a typical rebbetzin of any sort. The wife of my rebbe muvak (from high school) is also a fantastic person - and has a masters in nutrition, writes a column in a Jewish newspaper, and runs the nutrition program at a day school (though they no longer live in our community, unfortunately).
well said.
I had this discussion with Rebbetzin Lerner (head of admissions of Central) about the role of women in the community. While it may be OK for women to become something more than just mothers, why aren't they being taught that this is the ideal, rather than making it a second class choice for the girls?
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